Gaining Confidence After a Breakup with Dating and Relationship Expert Katie Maher

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Katie is a relationship and empowers coach, along with a mental health occupational therapist. She works with a lot of women to focus on creating genuine connections, coming out of heartbreak, and wanting to escape and start something new and fresh. Katie herself has gone through the dating scene as a single mom in her 30s after being cheated on while she was pregnant. 

When asking her what most people struggle with she talked about the confidence aspect. Even if the breakup had more to do with the other person, there’s a little bit of tentativeness, and past rejections can knock this confidence. Especially since the pandemic, she talks about the struggle with body image and the questioning of if we’re putting out our best selves. There are a lot of different reasons, and reasons why things become stagnant. 

When someone is lacking hope and optimism Katie talks about taking the lessons that you learned from the relationship. After break-ups, we tend to idealize the relationship, and we need to recognize the good and the bad that came with the relationship. Gaining more information and clarity on moving forward and what we would do differently ourselves. She talks about making it more of an experiment and evolving as people about what we wanted. Looking at it as the buffet of life, it’s good to work through it and see what we like and what we don’t like. 

With her background in working in mental health, she talks about how a lot of the time exposure therapy helps with anxiety. Therefore, just go on dates and not put pressure on yourself. Having your own coach, counselor, and friend to support you through the process is such a great way to stay true to your dating goals. 

One of the last main takeaways is as women we often get caught up in making lists about what our future partners might look like or what type of job we want them to have. We need to get away from this, at our core think about what we really value in a person, and hold ourselves to the standard that we’d want our future partner to be in. 

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